The Rules for Youth Ministry: #1 – Be Easy to Work… | UMC YoungPeople
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21
January 2025

The Rules for Youth Ministry: #1 – Be Easy to Work With

By Chris Wilterdink

For the podcast episode this article is based on, listen to Youth Worker Collective.
We’re slowly rolling out some “Rules for Youth Ministry” to help leaders create better opportunities for discipleship through their ministry AND increase the odds for a ministry leader to stay around for a while. As Morpheus from The Matrix (for the classic movie fans out there) would say…” Some rules can be bent; others can be broken.” – so take this series as suggestions.
Rule #1: Be easy to work with. This will help you build trust, collaborate, and become more effective.

Plan Ahead

Begin with the end in mind. Start with preparation. To plan ahead is to respect the time and energy of others.

  1. Communicate early and often. Share schedules, expectations, and responsibilities in advance so everyone can prepare effectively, from church staff to parents to volunteers to attendees.
  2. Prevent Time/Space Conflicts. Make needed reservations for space, collect supplies, and so on so that you demonstrate intentionality in your plans
  3. Allows More Intentionality. When everyone knows what they’re working toward, staying organized and focused is easier. When you aren’t pulling together an activity at the last minute, you have freed up energy for more planning, preparation, and relationship building.

Be Ready to Adapt

Flexibility is essential in ministry as is grace. Plans are important, but the ability to adapt is what keeps things moving forward when the unexpected happens.

  1. Stay calm under pressure. Your composure will set the tone for others when plans go awry.
  2. Focus on people over perfection. A shift in plans is an opportunity to prioritize relationships and connection.

Be a Team Player (Lead by Example)

Model collaboration and humility to create a culture of trust and mutual respect.

  1. Do What Needs to be Done. Avoid getting stuck on “what is or is not your job” when doing tasks. Your “job” is to help make and form disciples. That might mean taking out the trash or other things you don’t love. As you do those though, make a list of how you can recruit others or alter your planning so that you don’t spend all your time on things that drain your energy.
  2. Value others’ contributions. Invite and incorporate ideas from volunteers, parents, and youth. Incorporate the church’s overall mission and vision into youth ministry plans.

Be Known

Be approachable and genuine. Be in places where you are not in charge.

  1. Be visible. Attend community events. Be in worship. Appear outside of designated youth ministry spaces and times.
  2. Be authentic. Embrace who you are as a child of God. Be approachable about your faith.

Be Clear

Clarity in communication avoids confusion and builds confidence.

  1. Articulate expectations and needs. Be specific about roles, responsibilities, and deadlines.
  2. Repeat key messages. Not everyone absorbs information the first time; reinforce important details and 

Be Privately Critical and Publicly Supportive

Handling challenges well speaks volumes about character and leadership.

  1. Address issues privately. When conflicts arise, deal with them directly to maintain trust and respect. Providing critique does not mean being negative. It does mean problem-solving and improvement processes.
  2. Celebrate wins publicly - your own as well as others. Share credit when deserved.
  3. Create alignment for the whole church. If you feel out of alignment with a church priority, take time to reflect and find out why. If alignment isn’t a possibility, consider other options.

Do What You Say You Will Do

Follow-through is a cornerstone of integrity. 

  1. Avoid “over promising and under delivering” AND “under promising and over delivering.”  Simply doing exactly what you said you would do generates incredible trust.
  2. Be consistent over time. Reliability builds a reputation of trustworthiness that strengthens your ministry.

Final Thoughts

Being easy to work with is more than a way to smooth out the rougher parts of leading ministry — it is a way of embodying Christ-like humility, grace, and accountability. 

Chris serves as Director of Young People’s Ministries for Discipleship Ministries of the United Methodist Church. Chris has a BA in English Education, and an MS in Project Management, and over 15 years of local-church youth ministry experience. He is passionate about leadership and faith development in young people and helping ministry leaders understand their value in the lives of young people. A Stephen Minister, Chris is a native of Colorado living in Franklin, TN with his wife Emily, 2 children, and sausage-shaped beagle.